Sunday, August 9, 2020

Shared memories - Frances and John

#Disclaimer: I am not a writer, or a story teller, not a good one anyway, but want to share my memories. We are living and going through a crazy times,  and I am not in denial of what is going on around me.



I want to share with you my memories of certain experiences and people that have come in to my life and sadly are no longer here.  I’d like to start out with the summer when I was six.  It was my first flight ever, and I was by myself flying to NYC from the mid-west as a six-year-old. I was so excited and happy! I got to meet the pilots and get my plastic little wings pinned on me by a beautiful stewardess.  I got to sit at the front by the window and fell in love with flying. 

When I arrived in NYC my aunt and uncle lived in a building on the corner of 124th Street and Rockaway Beach Blvd, in Rockaway Beach, NY.  The building was located at the end of the beach block, and it  had a grand entrance, foyer and staircase. Built back in the early nineteen hundred’s it housed plenty of single people that worked in the city. I was told by a long time resident that many actors had lived there. I can imagine how the foyer may have looked like with chairs and couches back in its heyday, but when I arrived it was large and empty, only a wall of locked mailboxes.  The majority of the apartments studios with very few being one or two bedrooms.  The elevator in the building and was tiny even by a six-year old’s perception, and it always kept breaking down.  Next to the elevator there was an apartment where Frances, John and their Mom lived. 

I wasn’t shy about knocking on the door when I realized that Frances lived there and he was my age.  The door opened their mom was holding John on her hip. All John had on was a diaper and a full head of brown straight hair with bangs, he must have been about 2 or 3 years old.  I asked their Mom if Frances could come out and play in the foyer with me.  Frances bounced out of the house with his curly blonde hair and bright eyes.  That entire summer we played together in the foyer with our imaginations running wild!  We had such a great time together! 

I would visit every summer but as we got older, we grew apart, and I always knew that both John and Frances were a bit different. Their childhood wasn’t normal as they spent a lot of time in doctor’s offices and hospitals. They were both hemophiliacs.  By the time we were teenagers in the mid 80’s HIV was prevalent and both boys got infected.  It was taboo, people shunned the ones that contracted the virus and I can't imagine what they both went through growing up during that time

I came back to live full time in NYC when I was 19 with a baby in tow.  Staying with my Aunt and Uncle again, this time across the street from the building in a house they bought. From the front porch I saw Frances walking down the street in an intense conversation with a young lady about the same age.  I could see he was upset just the way he was walking and smoking the cigarette in his hand. As much as I wanted to run down and say hello, I didn’t want to interrupt them.  It was the last time I saw him before he died from complication of HIV.  John died a couple of years later. 

Around the time that John died, I was walking down the street with my son in hand, when Frances and Johns Mom was walking towards me. She stopped in front of me and told me that she has lost her purpose in life since both her children were gone and didn’t know what to do with her life.  I remember just standing there and looking at her then down at my own four-year-old son knowing what she meant, but I didn't have any type of response but a nod.  

I will always remember Frances as my childhood friend playing in the Foyer in the building and John in diapers in his Mother’s arms.  They will always be in my heart. 


Monday, May 11, 2020

A new day

My last post was October, 2019.......  From October until now so much has changed.  When I left my full time job on Friday September 13th, I didn't even take a day off before jumping in full time into real estate.  I was showing homes, holding open houses, writing contracts, learning new computer programs, taking classes, and had to be told to take a day off.... which to me I enjoyed everything so much that I didn't feel like stopping, I was enjoying it, I was having fun meeting new people, looking at all different types of homes and not being behind a cubicle all day.  December came so quickly and I was so busy that my usual routine of sending Christmas cards out to family and friends, was out the window. Christmas shopping didn't happen until the week before Christmas. To top all of that off Christmas eve I still didn't have a gift for my husband, and I didn't know what to get him.  I'm in Best buy with ll the electronic gadgets and couldn't choose when I remembered  he had complained about the vacuum, so I got him a new vacuum for Christmas.  I guess that was a poor choice as a Christmas gift, but he opened the box on Christmas morning, was a bit surprised, and vacuumed that afternoon to test it out.  I felt bad about putting my traditions to the side, and not taking my time for thoughtful gifts,  but I was finally happy doing work that I enjoyed.  I was getting busier as each day passed. I didn't think about creating any art until I had to create my 2020 goal board and they gave us each a large canvas. I was so excited!!! I painted  a bunch of little homes with sold signs on them as I drove by in my little pretend red sports car to my little pretend beach house.

 March came and everything changed. It was already changing around the world and now it was here.  All the people getting sick in and so many dying. NYC shutting down. Who would have ever thought?  I was on the phone with my daughter daily not knowing what the school was going to do.  Then they just shut down abruptly and my daughter was on a flight home 2 days later. It was also 2 days before my 51st birthday. It was bitter sweet that our world was shutting down due to a pandemic. I was thankful that I got to spend my birthday with all my kids and hubby together but I was sad that it was under these conditions.

As everything slowed down, shut down or got cancelled April went by so fast it felt like a blur.
Zoom meetings, masks in the stores and office buildings.  staying at home.   It's been nice that I have my daughter here since my husband and son are deemed essential workers.  I leave only when necessary and mostly work from home.  This week I received an email from Say Si, stating they have decided to do an online auction for their school and invited artists to donate their work.  I was so excited!  I responded immediately and got to work. I named this piece A New Day.  It will go up for auction in June and I will make an effort to share on my blog.

9"x9" fused glass with painted background in shadow box

 I hope everyone stays safe and healthy.